1. Who was your favorite character? Why?
K: Aibileen – her bravery, persistence and determination was something to be admired.D: I like Miss Celia. I don't think she was completely oblivious to the way things were (blacks vs. whites), but she was color-blind when it came to her relationship with Minny. I think she really, truly loved Minny and paid her to be her best friend.
2. What do you think motivated Hilly? On one hand she is terribly cruel to Aibileen and her own help, as well as to Skeeter once she realizes that she can’t control her. Yet she’s a wonderful mother. Do you think that one can be a good mother and, at the same time, a deeply flawed person?
K: I don’t remember much from the book that would have made me think Hilly was a good mother. She seemed to care about her children more than Elizabeth, but still seemed to put her needs far above theirs. I do think someone can be a caring and loving mother and still make mistakes. However, I think Hilly’s biggest flaws – her closed-mindedness, inflated ego and stubbornness are likely traits that her children will inherent simply by being around her and observing how she treats others. I wouldn’t classify her as a wonderful mother.
D: I think Hilly's desire to maintain her reputation was her biggest motivation. With her husband involved in politics she did what she felt would look 'right' to others. When you change your actions for such an extended period of time, your character soon begins to change as well. As for Hilly being a good mother, I'm not totally convinced. I'm sure her children were clean, well-fed, and well educated, but it takes much more than that to be a good mother.
3. Like Hilly, Skeeter’s mother is a prime example of someone deeply flawed yet somewhat sympathetic. She seems to care for Skeeter – and she also seems to have very real feelings for Constantine. Yet the ultimatum she gives Constantine is untenable, and most of her interaction with Skeeter is critical. Do you think Skeeter’s mother is sympathetic or an unsympathetic character. Why?
K: I think Skeeter’s mother was probably raised by someone like Hilly. Her flaws are so deeply engrained that she isn’t able to see the world any other way.
D: Like Hilly, I think Skeeter's mother treated Constantine and her daughter the way she did because she had a captive audience when the encountered the situation. Had she been home alone when Constantine's daughter arrived I think the entire situation would have ended differently. She acted the way she did because she felt she had no other choice. I'm not sure whether or not this makes her sympathetic or unsympathetic as a whole, but she was definitely greatly influenced by the times.
4. How much of a person’s character would you say is shaped by the times in which he or she lives?
K: More than the “time” in which they live, which certainly contributes to their character is the “who” in which they live. Who are their influences? Are their positive people in their life?D: I think it makes a difference but, as Skeeter proves, one is capable of looking beyond the times and into the hearts of those around them.
5. Did it bother you that Skeeter was willing to overlook so many of Stuart’s faults so that she could get married, and that it wasn’t until he literally got up and walked away that the engagement fell apart?
K: Not really. She never seemed real interested in wanting to be in a relationship, but when he came along it was new, fun and convenient. Skeeter seemed pretty level headed, and with what she was researching and finding out about how people she knew and trusted most (Hilly and her mother) treated their help, she was probably able to see past a few faults in Stuart.
D: The want/need to be loved is human nature. With her relationship with her mother at odds, and her friendships void of any true emotion it's no wonder she clung to Stuart--he showed genuine interest in her at a time when few others did.
6. Do you believe that Minny was justified in her distrust of white people?
K: To a certain extent. Minny’s hard headed personality probably factored into that as well, but its pretty clear that she wasn’t treated with the respect she deserved.D: To some degree, absolutely. At the same time, her own husband is not the man he should be which should give her an inkling that the color of one's skin doesn't determine their trustworthiness.
7. Do you think that had Aibileen stayed working for Miss Elizabeth, Mae Mobley would have grown up to be racist like her mother? Do you think racism is inherent or taught?
K: I think Mae Mobly was probably affected by her time with Aibileen and would likely have been less racist than her mother. I think racism is taught and even at her young age Mae Mobley seemed to have a pretty clear grasp on what made her different from the help.
D: That's a tough call. I like to think that Abileen's "lessons" and encouragement could have really changed Mae Mobley. On the other hand, Mae Mobley seems to have a kind and gentle heart and maybe that alone will make a difference. It takes a child many years to develop his/her own perspective on things and whether it's inherent or taught, she can and will eventually make up her own mind.
8. From the perspective of a twenty-first-century reader, the hair shellac system that Skeeter undergoes seems ludicrous. Yet women still alter their looks in rather peculiar ways as the definition of “beauty” changes with the times. Looking back on your past, what’s the most ridiculous beauty regimen you ever underwent?
K: I don’t get too wild and crazy. At the end of my senior year of high school I decided I wanted a perm, and came out looking like a cocker spaniel, yet kept perming it for a couple of years. At the same time, I was also doing home highlights so my hair was in horrible shape.
D: Yikes. Nothing? I probably should've tried a thing or two...ha!
9. The author manages to paint Aibileen with a quiet grace and an aura of wisdom about her. How do you think she does this?
K: Through words. The message seems to come through with many instances of Aibileen interacting with people of both races and all ages. Also, the format in which the book is written where its first person from three points of view adds a different element in that we get to hear Aibileen’s private thoughts.
D: It's her style of writing, without a doubt. We learn this by how she handles her relationships with others, the words she chooses to speak (or not to speak), and her actions in key situations.
10. Do you think there are still vestiges of racism in relationships in which people of color work for people who are white?
K: I would like to think not, but I’m not that naive.
D: Absolutely.
11. What did you think about Minny’s pie for Miss Hilly? Would you have gone as far as Minny did for revenge?
K: Again, I would like to think not but without walking a lifetime in her shoes, who knows. It certainly sounded as though Minny regretted her actions that day throughout most of the book.
D: Oofta, that makes me cringe! I think Minny feels as though it was justified, and feels terrible for actually doing it all at the same time.
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